I haven't been able to figure out why this lyric has stuck itself in my head and won't leave. This entire day, I've been waiting for the right moment, the right place, or the right Facebook status mood update to use this. But really, I've been dwelling on the song.
The first few lines go something like "you can't run away forever, but there's nothing wrong with getting a good head start." Later it talks about shutting yourself out from a broken heart. What a wonderful cliche in a classic rock song, right? Wounded hearts, broken dreams, dark Los Angeles nights blah blah blah...
It's 10:43 pm, and I'm sitting here at the center alone, with nothing but the ghostly hum of the streetcars below. The truth is, I'm still waiting for that dream. I'm waiting for that moment where the audience cheers, the protagonist (yours truly) meets his clear external goal (thank you HPW), and jumps his way to the emotionally satisfying ending. Honestly, just a little foreshadowing would be welcome. In my last blog, I mentioned how I view my life as me sitting in a theater alone, and watching it play out on screen. I feel like I'm leaning forward, like something major, some kind of massive turning point is about to happen which will determine the rest of the story. Honest to Oprah, the suspense is killing me! When does the good guy get the girl? When does he defeat the bad guy? When does he make the decision to push on through to the climax?? DOES HE EVEN DO THESE THINGS AT ALL??!!?
Sigh...just wait.
"Just wait" this voice tells me. Wait for when it's right. I could spend hours describing everything that is ticking through this crazy brain of mine, and I probably still wouldn't be able to make it clear enough. The truth is, if there is no other reason for me to walk through this planet for however long or short of a time the Good Lord gives me, I want people to be okay. That's all I want. My mind is aching from hearing countless arguments, both religious and otherwise, which have driven families apart. I can think of friendships which have been ripped right to the core because of a misunderstanding, or a broken promise, or a dating relationship that got in the way. (You know who you are.) I'm tired. I'm tired of fighting. I am tired of listening to people fight. I wish life wasn't so short, but it is. I stab myself in the foot just as much as those I am preaching to because I myself have held a grudge against someone for a while. I must let this go.
I will not end this blog on a majorly spiritual note or a Bible verse. I merely want to send a message to the world. If you choose to read, then thanks for escaping to my little place in time for a while. We all share our own rock and roll dreams, why else would we be in this city if we didn't? So, thanks dear Los Angeles. May we continue to revel in this crazy world we live in, and maybe, leave it a little better than when we came into it.
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